Let's Talk Body Positivity & Inclusivity
The wedding industry can be an odd place. There’s so much talk about body positivity and inclusivity, but pick up a magazine, look on Pinterest, and the same body types get repeated.
Groups like NineDots and Photography Farm, have allowed me to speak about this subject at conferences for professional wedding photographers.
So today, I thought I’d mention some of the things I’ve talked about.
What Is Body Positivity?
It’s not about skinny shaming, it’s not snide comments about eating sandwiches, or posting a single photo of someone who is plus size so you can say you’re Body Positive.
I prefer to think of it as Body Inclusivity, celebrating all body types.
EVERYONE DESERVES TO FEEL INCREDIBLE.
EVERYONE DESERVES BEAUTIFUL PHOTOS.
Regardless of your weight, height, gender, race, physical ability, age, you deserve to feel beautiful.
3,303 Images
When I spoke at NineDots, I did an experiment.
I went through hundreds of wedding blogs and magazines, and counted the different body types featured in the images.
Out of 3,303 images here’s what I found:
- 292 images of plus size Brides, and 29 of plus size Grooms
- 0 images of muscular Brides, and only 1 of a muscular Groom
- 2 images of a Groom shorter than his Bride
- 0 images of bald Brides, 137 images of bald Grooms, and only 1 image of a Bride with short hair
- 42 images of older Brides and 34 of older Grooms
- 7 images of a trans Bride, none of a trans Groom
- 0 images of a Bride or Groom with a visible disability
I also noticed that many of these were in “alternative” wedding blogs and magazines, and hardly any were in mainstream media.
Comments I've Had
At Thrive, I told them some of the comments I had received since getting engaged.
“Are you going to wear your glasses on your wedding day?”
“Your hair is too wild”
“Are you going to straighten your teeth?”
“Are you going to lose weight?”
“You’ll have to wear high heels”
These are real comments I received from people.
The Photographers in the room were shocked, so I asked them, “If those are comments I have received, someone who is loud about her views on body inclusivity, what comments do you think your couples may have had?”
The Outcome
With the media only representing one body type, and comments from every direction, are we surprised that people don’t feel comfortable in front of the camera?
Are we surprised when people are shy or don’t feel body confident?
This is why I scream as loud as I can, SHOW YOUR UNIQUE STYLE!!
Show everyone how special you are.
Show them how beautiful you are.
Celebrate how wonderfully unique you are.
In the words of Oscar Wilde, who, let’s face it, was unapologetically himself, “Be yourself, everyone else is already taken.”.
Things I Do To Be Body Inclusive
I know I could gatekeep. I know I could try to sell tickets to an online course about ways of being Body Inclusive, but I don’t roll like that.
These are things I do in my business to actually be Body Inclusive.
Show Diversity
Celebrate everyone, and let them shine!
Show diversity in your portfolios, on your website.
Work with wonderful, inclusive model agencies like ZBD Talent.
But remember to be respectful; some people like to keep their images private, so adhere to GDPR.
Be Accessible
I have a whole blog Making Photoshoots & Wedding Photos Accessible where I talk about things like checking your locations have good footpaths, or that you have a quiet area in case someone feels overwhelmed.
I’m open about the fact I’m learning British Sign Language. I’m still pretty rubbish, but I did learn Jingle Bells for Christmas.
Words Have Power
We’ve all experienced the gut-wrenching feeling when we know we’ve put our foot in it by saying the wrong thing, so why not use your words to say something positive?
I don’t like terms like “thin” or “skinny”, and I only use “Plus Size” because it’s a definition. I don’t like those terms because I don’t know how the person I’m saying them to perceives them. Do they actually like being called “skinny”?
I prefer words like “dapper”, “strong”, “gorgeous”, “handsome”, “fabulous”, and you all know I love saying “Hello Beautiful People!”.
However, this is not just about how you address others; it’s about how you address yourself. When looking at the mirror, use the power of words to be kind and fabulous to yourself. How you think about yourself and talk to yourself has a HUGE impact.
Show Them How It's Done!
If you’re gonna talk the talk, you better walk, skip, dance, roll the talk!
You may have noticed some fabulous photos of me in this blog. After being given a lot of opinions about what I should and shouldn’t do on our wedding day, I teamed up with Sacha Louise Photography & Becky Takes Photos for a little photoshoot.
“Are you going to wear your glasses on your wedding day?” I wore my glasses.
“Your hair is too wild” I let my natural curls go wild.
“Are you going to straighten your teeth?” I didn’t.
“Are you going to lose weight?” Nope.
“You’ll have to wear high heels” I rocked my black ankle boots.
I walked around Boscombe, on market day, in a gold gown styled the way I wanted. I went into shops, I danced in the street, I posed in a supermarket trolley.
Am I saying that for a wedding photographer to be Body Inclusive, they need to wear a gown? NO!
What I’m saying is that you need to be unapologetically you. Shine as bright as you can. Show the world that you are fabulous just the way you are. Because if you can do it, you will inspire others.
So What's Next?
I’m not sure is the honest answer.
At the time of writing this, I’m not booked for any further talks, but you can rest assured I’ll still be here, celebrating all of you for being the incredible, unique, beautiful people you are.
So remember, always, unapologetically, #ShowYourUniqueStyle
